Wednesday, December 08, 2010
Fighting (For?) the Farm ...
I came to a realization today as I was driving around in my little NAPA minivan delivering parts to fix the broken cars of the world. That realization was that sometimes I get frustrated and most often it is the farm that frustrates me. When I get back to the farm after 6:15 PM on most nights (and much later each Sunday, Wednesday, and some Tuesdays) I often feel overwhelmed by the chores that need to be done ... let alone the things that I would like or need to do in order to keep the farm running somewhat smoothly (things like fixing fence, adding water systems, finding a place for the pigs to live this winter). Please understand that I don't say this to complain because I realize my plate is no more full than the next person and I have so much more to be thankful for, but I do often wonder if I'm "Fighting the Farm" or "Fighting For the Farm" if you get what I mean.
There are many times when I look around the farm (lately it's pretty dark when that happens) and the thought pops into my mind, "I could sell the pigs, sell the cattle, sell the sheep, sell most of the equipment, and just keep a few chickens to laugh at (and a pig to kick ... name that movie). Then when I came home from town I could walk into the house and "relax". It all seems very easy actually ... just liquidate it all and chalk it up to one of my grand adventures and passing fancies. Then I would no longer have to be "Fighting the Farm". And I wonder, should I even be "Fighting the Farm"? Is it worth it? Is it the right course for me? Is it even worth doing?
On the other hand there are times when I realize that I am "Fighting For the Farm". Most of these times don't happen while I'm outside in my cold weather clothes and a headlamp fixing an electric fence that the sheep decided wasn't good enough and feeding the pigs in the dark. My "Fighting For the Farm" moments usually happen when I'm making a delivery to customers in Des Moines, taking a couple hogs to the processor, or thinking about the future of the farm.
The difficulty and the goal is to have more "Fighting For" moments than "Fighting" moments. I've decided this can happen in a couple of different ways. The most obvious way is to focus on what is possible and what I can accomplish ...
**I started writing this post a couple weeks ago and never finished it. As I was working on a post for today I came across this one and as I read over it I thought it would be a good idea to just post it as is ... I'm not sure that I really completed my thoughts on it or that I can draw them to a close right now, but it is a fairly accurate snapshot of my mind ... at least on that particular night. So ... I'll post it ... it's kind of like my full disclosure post ... to show that I get frustrated with the farm, and still press on ;)